Beginning and End and Everything in the Middle

This year is full of lasts. Last Durga Puja before my marriage, last birthday before marriage, last Diwali. Last visit to Delhi before my wedding. Tonight, on the eve of my departure, I am all the more imprinting the hugs and sights and sounds of my house.

Next year will be the firsts. First Durga Puja, first birthday, first Diwali, first anniversary. I'll have to carve out the traditions of my family. Taking flavors from my parents life, I will add to my own life's curry.

I wish changes would be more gradual. Let's see how. :D

Initially, you start wearing, say, just the wedding bangles. Then after some months, you begin wearing sindoor. You get used to that, so you graduate to spending some hours everyday with you husband. Then, you call his parents Mummy-Daddy-part2. Once you get the hang of two sets of parents, you gradually include all his relatives, one by one. Meanwhile, you teach your husband to call your relatives in the right way.

So, after a year, you are set with all that. Now, you begin, maybe cooking for him, one meal at a time. First, dabble with only the salad, then, prepare rice, then cook one sabji. Then, after a few months, prepare a full meal, just for him. Slowly, introduce your cooking to his family members, one-by-one. This way, you have to fulfill only one persons expectation at a time. Later, you prepare meal for all the members, when you are comfortable and the muhurt is right.

By now, start putting your husbands name in next-to-kin. Write marital status-married. Go slow and easy, one form at a time. No hurry, no stress. Maybe, by now, you have learned how to look like a coy bride, all shy and sweet.

Then, slowly, you start coordinating your office timings, so that you can leave and return together. Yo are still living in you father's house, mind you! Weeks later, you begin buying some small groceries together. Don't frighten you husband by buying a months supplies in one go. After groceries, start buying gifts for you friends birthdays, Diwali etc. Chalk out your common friends, common fave aunts and uncles and cousins. Begin making rudimentary budgets.

By now, you are comfy yelling and arguing, once in a while. You also know that you can disagree occasionally. You know each others likes and dislikes. You know what bugs you about him. You know what bothers him.

Now you can perhaps call yourself Mrs So-n-So. Find an attractive signature carrying your husbands surname. Send some mails and sign your new name.

Now, you are all set! After all this, you can live with him.

See, how easy life would be, if only we were given time to get used to being a couple. Just some mantras and one grand puja to turn your life 180 degree is too abrupt, dont you think?